Zzzzzzz

Ya know what I hate? Not being able to get to sleep. I mean, I'm a fairly routine person. I find a schedule and it usually isn't long before I don't need an alarm clock to get me going in the morning. BUT, this night time-getting to sleep stuff drives me NUTS!! I've had trouble getting to sleep for as long as I can remember. I remember as a kid lying in bed, staring at my night light until I fell asleep. I also remember resting my head on the window sill above my bed, staring out the window watch Todd Swonk (isn't it funny how we remember names) mess around on his motorcycles .... likely why I have one today... until I fell into my nightly slumber. Then shortly after college, the stresses of not having a solid job and lacking firm direction, kept my thoughts spinning at night and my eyes wide. I remember often watching the clock tick away hour by hour until it was time to get up and start the day. Nothing worse that having to go to work (back then it was mowing college lawns) on 45 - 60 minutes sleep. And here it is years later, past my bedtime and I lie awake. Well, thank goodness for laptops and blogs to occupy my mind as I attempt to tire myself out.

I know, I know... they make medicines for this, you say. Of course, and I have it. The best of the best, in my opinion. But do you have any idea how expensive that stuff is? Not to mention addictive? And so I use it sparingly. Sure, I've tried counting sheep --- I'm not a fan of that game. And of course, there is always the "count your blessings" till you fall asleep game. I'm a fan of that, but honestly my mind gets so carried away I can't often stay on task. In many ways I think night-time is the time my mind gets busy trying to catch up to everything my body did and didn't do during the day.

My dad struggles with the same thing... I always tell him to make a list of the things he's thinking about. Sort of an "emptying of the mind" if you will. It often works for me... but not lately. Lately it's a deep penetrating ache in my muscles. Not a cramp so much as a tightness or stiffness that doesn't go away. It's a constant ache and it is really starting to get annoying. Sure, I read the internet, I talk to MD's but do I really want to take more medicines for something like this? No. And so I ask.... does anyone out there have any "secrets to sleep" methods?

I currently do the following:

Lie down consistently between 10:30 and 11:15pm each night.
Shower or bathe each night right before bed to relax my muscles and stay in routine.
Sometimes, take Ambien or Melatonin (though not enough to get addicted).
Pray.
Stretch.

And so again I ask.... can anyone out there give me some helpful hints on things you do to be able to get a good nights sleep?

The Nicest Guy I Know

This is my brother and tomorrow he will be 30 years old. That blows my mind. And so this blog is a tribute to my brother, Brian, the nicest guy I know.

Of course, I was only three or so when Brian was born, but I remember being pretty excited that mom was bringing home a BOY. There are many things I see today that remind me of growing up with my brother; Legos, Transformers, Scooby -Doo, and farm equipment. Life hasn't changed much over the past 30 years as my nephew, almost 8, shares many of the same interest as his uncle Brian did those years ago.

I have fond memories of growing up with my brother, but it's not so much who he was back then that makes me proud; but rather who he's come to be. His busy schedule of church camps, school activities, working on the farm, tutoring and babysitting isn't due to a guy that can't say "no". He's a busy guy because he is loyal, committed, compassionate, and dedicated to others. He cares about people, not just his family, not just his friends, not just kids ... but PEOPLE. He's a man that doesn't take much time for himself, because that would be taking away from care and attention he could be giving to others.

My hope for my, one and only, brother is that others would see that he is truly "a one and only" type of guy. I hope that others would appreciate him as much as I do, but show it to him more.

I hope that he takes care of himself half as well as he takes care of others. And I hope he knows that even though I've probably never said it until tonight; he truly is the nicest guy I know.

Happy Birthday, Brian!

PS: If anyone out there knows of any single girls --- so is he! (karla).... sorry, couldn't resist. ;)

Checking in...

Wow, it's been awhile since my last post. I guess that's just a sign that not much is going on to report on this month. The family I'm housing continues to reside in my home. And though it's going well, I'm reminded of just how much I like "my space" and I'm not referring to the website. I've been amazed at just how introverted I've become over the last 10 years or so; how does that happen?

Work has been going well. It's the time of year when reports are due, new employees are being hired and the big news is that next week is my 5 year anniversary with the agency. Crazy, isn't it? (Pardon the pun.) ;)

As far as the home goes ... I continue to love it. The big decision to be made now is "just how do I plan to grow grass on 2 inches of dirt laid upon several feet of stone?" My yard has much to be desired... maybe I'll share photos tomorrow. As for tonight, it's too dark to get out and take some.

Well, I wish I had more to share. Something deep and thought provoking but at this point, I'm just waiting for bedtime. Trying to relax and plan my day for tomorrow. I just thought I'd check in and let those of you who actually read this know that I'm still among the living --living one day at a time.

Bed Time

Hi friends.... just thought I'd check in. Not much to say today. Tired, sore throat and really just ready to go to bed. Seems too early. Something about going to bed before the sun does that makes that difficult for me. My mind races thinking about all the things I have to do, but then I'm reassured by the fact that I'm off on Wednesday. Perhaps I'll get my "stuff" done then. For tonight, I'm feeling that the bed and pillow are just what I need. So... I guess I'll go find me some vitamin C to fight off this cold-like feeling I feel coming my way and turn in for the night. Good night, friends.